Obnoxious Internet People

I've come to the conclusion that the three most obnoxious groups of internet people in the world are atheists, vegans and people who don't watch TV. 

Generally speaking, the atheists are the people who cannot speak on the internet or mention in some random conversation how more enlightened they are compared to the rest of us.  In defense of the atheists, I think the reason they militantly brag about not believing in God or arrogantly belittle those who believe in a creator is because rather than trying to convince us there is no God, they are desperately attempting to convince themselves they are right.  I suppose if you repeat something long enough, eventually, you will believe your own nihilistic rhetoric despite that innate need we all have to seek God.  I suppose this level of cognitive dissonance leads to frustration and anger.  And how do angry and frustrated people usually react?  The answer... next time you come across an internet atheist, pay attention to him or her. 

Once upon a time, internet atheists pissed me off more than any other group of internet people; the reasons being twofold:  One, they wear their atheism like it's some badge of courage.  As if  not believing in something makes them more enlightened and wiser than those of us who, by faith, believe there is a deeper meaning to life.  And secondly, atheists will never miss an opportunity to insult a believer.  And let's be really honest here, if you're gonna deny God exists, you have to deny the devil exists.  And if you are going to deny any spiritual dimension existing, then you are going to have dismiss ghosts, the paranormal and the millions of eye witness accounts throughout history of angels, ghosts, demons and anything spiritual.   For me, denying the existence of God is not just some simple theoretical concept like realizing there is no Santa Clause.  It would be more like denying there is no Christmas, no December 25th, no Christmas carols or movies, no goodwill... not believing in God is the dismissing of everything good, every mystery and everything scientists, scholars and historians debate to this day.  Atheism is not a mission statement.  It is a long winded essay with a flawed hypothesis that truth must equate to logic

Internet atheists still irritate me but to a lesser degree than the internet vegans.  Certainly, they are as arrogant as the internet atheists but they, generally speaking, are more inclined to be self-righteous.  If you eat meat, you rape cows.  The blood of cows, chickens and pigs are on our hands if we don't stick to a strict plant based diet.  Every argument with them is based on extreme images of violence and some grandiose world view that animals are just people with fur. 

The group of internet people that annoy me more than any other group of people are those who strut around the internet like a peacock mentioning they don't watch TV.  .Nothing is more pretentious than telling people you avoid television.  Not watching TV does not make you more intelligent or more cultured than the vast majority of people who do watch it.

Contrary to the opinions of non viewers of TV, I believe television plays an important part in our lives.... in moderation.  Some of my best memories involve television shows and movies.  Who doesn't remember how they felt watching the finales of such shows like MASH or Cheers or Lost?  Who can't name every Brady family member?  Who hasn't punched a jukebox like Fonzi?  Who, in high school or college, didn't have a specific night of the week where we gathered with friends to watch a television show together?  For me, it was Wednesday nights watching 90210 with my friends.  As ridiculous as that show was, it was also something that bonded our little circle.  What older adult didn't go to bed with Johnny Carson being the last words they heard before falling asleep with a smile on their face after a long day?  Who didn't watch Little House on the Prairie and long for simpler times but then realize the Ingals had no television and watching them was much better than being them? 

Television improves social skills.  Even Rain Man found solace in Judge Wapner.  Television has the power to bring relationships closer.  Find a girl that passionately loves the same TV shows you passionately love and odds are, she is yours forever. 

Television can teach tolerance and show people in a different light than our perceived notions of those same people..  In the early 90's, MTV had a gay roommate on Real World named Pedro.  This was before being gay was cool.  This was during a time "fag" wasn't deemed offensive.  As a straight ultra conservative white guy, I watched Pedro's journey from being this gay Cuban outcast to being universally loved and fodder around the college cafeteria the morning after Real World aired.  He was just like me.  Just a regular guy who wanted to be accepted.  It was television and specifically Pedro that taught me some tolerance for those with a lifestyle I do not agree with.

Television also has taught me self-awareness.  I grew up without a dad and found myself learning how real men conduct themselves as fathers because of TV.  From Andy Griffith to Red Foreman, I learned that a good father will always have this air of toughness and willingness to protect his family while still having this ability to be vulnerable when his own family was in need of a more gentle hand. 

Television shapes lives, builds memories and can teach us lessons while showing us scenarios that may not be accessible in our every day lives.  So when some pretentious person runs around the internet proclaiming they don't watch TV, I can't help but think I am in the presence of someone so vapidly self-unaware and narcissistic that if they saw their own reflection on a turned off TV screen, they would fall in love with their own image and attempt to jump into that TV set.and end up with a concussion.   

I suppose the only thing worse on the internet than someone who proudly proclaims they don't watch TV would be if that very person was also a vegan atheist.