Disclaimer: This advice is to be applied carefully. No scientific research was done. This advice is based solely on my observations here on Facebook. (Also, its a joke)
For the Boys:
HOW TO PICKUP CHICKS ON FACEBOOK
1. Compliments are the first step into gaining her trust. Here are some examples:
Baby, you are fucking hawt.
I would love to tap your sweet fine ass.
2. After you have gained her trust by showering her with compliments, talk about yourself (lying is okay).
Some examples of things chicks like to hear:
Baby, I have a 14 inch python in my pants.
I have a PHD in pleasing women.
3. Also, chicks are impressed by guys who have trophies or metals. As you are speaking about yourself to the chick, tell her about the various awards you have won. Once again, lying is okay. Also, speak in third person... chicks love that. Here are some examples:
Hurl won first place in a clit licking contest.
Hurl won the nobel peace prize for rescuing puppies and orphans during Hurricane Katrina.
Hurl has a trophy for World's Most Unselfish Lover.
4. Once you have the chick's undivided love and affection by letting her know how awesome you are, the final step is to send pictures... This is the crucial key to getting the chick. Send her at least 10 pictures of your dick. Send at least 4 pictures of you holding your hard dick in your hand. Chicks love seeing guys masturbate.
Boys, follow these 4 short steps on how to pickup chicks, I promise you will get laid.
Hurl, you're a bloody fantastic genius! You must be like the chap in the Axe television spot.
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