So, tonight I had a conversation with someone about how women like bad boys. It's one of those topics everyone has discussed at some point. Either, some dudes will say they can never get the pretty girl because she is only interested in the bad boys or some dudes just use the "nice guys finish last" excuse.
So, after a few beers, it dawned on me how stupid this argument is....
Back in the early 90's, there was this tennis player that sounded like a chick when he talked but he had a mullet. He was dubbed "the bad boy of tennis". His name was Andre Agassi.
First of all, his name is Andre. Never in the history of bad boys has there been an Andre. But let's ignore that stupid fact.
I always wondered how anyone could be called "the bad boy of tennis". It's like saying some gay dude performing in Rent is the "bad boy of Broadway". You play TENNIS, Andre. You're not a bad boy.
But still I wondered why he got this dubious title.
After long consideration, I concluded it could only be the mullet. It certainly wasn't because of his dating life. He dated and/or married Brooke Shields for God's sake. She was a virgin until she was like 35. He certainly wasn't a bad boy just because he had his ear pierced. My middle aged mail man has his pierced. Maybe, my mailman is the bad boy of mailmen. I don't actually know.
Anyway, there really was nothing "bad" about Mr. Agassi, yet he had this stupid title of being a bad boy.
So, this whole notion that women like bad boys is all based on a loose definition of "bad".
Hell, Michael Jackson sang a song called "Bad". Yeah, he was quite intimidating.
Andre Agassi did these commercials back in the early 90's for Canon. The slogan was "Image is Everything". It was intended to play on his bad boy image. A tennis star with a bad haircut and an earring was synonymous with "rebel". Tennis is supposed to be a gentleman's sport and he wasn't quite the image you would expect to see on the grass courts of Wimbledon.
So, somehow this automatically made him a bad boy. Women supposedly flocked to him because of this image. I am pretty certain if you had drained his bank account and took away his fame, women would not have considered him a bad boy.
But that's beside the point.
Okay, so, where I think this whole stupid debate about bad boys and women being attracted to them is flawed is in our definition of what a bad boy is.
My roommate, for example, tells me she only dates bad boys that ride Harleys. She is under the impression that anyone that owns a Harley is a bad boy. I think a Harley is just a slightly elevated version of a ten speed which means that bikers are only slightly more "bad" than Mormons.
A motorcycle does not make a bad boy.
Fonzi rode a motorcycle. Have you seen him now? He's more mild tempered than Mr. Rogers ever was.
Gary Busey rode a motorcycle. He got in a wreck and is now slightly retarded. He was never a bad boy.
Harleys create a false image. If I drive a low rider, it doesn't make me a Mexican gangsta. It makes me a white guy driving a stupid looking car. This holds true when it comes to riding a Harley. It's just a damn means of transportation. Nothing less. Nothing more.
Look at the "bad boys" of pop culture. Luke Perry in 90210; just because he had sideburns and had abandonment issues. Donnie Wahlburg, with his scowl on his face and bad facial hair, was the bad boy of New Kids on the Block. Seriously, a dude in a boy band was called a bad boy. That's like saying the fat kid that sings tenor in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir is the bad boy of church music just because he looks angry half the time.
Other bad boys of pop culture.... Fonzi; a 5'5 Jewish man that was dating high school girls on Happy Days was a bad boy just because he wore a leather jacket and rode a motorcycle. Nick on Family Ties just because he said "Yo Mallory" all the time.
The list goes on. We've been programmed to label men "bad boys" if they meet certain criteria.
And this is where I think we are wrong. I do not believe women seek bad boys. I believe they seek what they've been programmed to believe a bad boy is.
If women really liked true bad boys, they would be dating the likes of Mike Tyson. Here's a man that bit a dude's ear off once. Or they would be masturbating to old speeches from Hitler. No one is more of a bad boy than Adolph.
And finally, everyone's favorite bad boy would be every woman's dream: O.J. Simpson.
A dude who killed two people and got away with it. Plus, he played football.
Now, that's a real bad boy.
Okay, this is just a theory and I'm slightly drunk like a bad ass.
Am I wrong?
Would you really be afraid of Fonzi if he wanted to fight you?
Do women really like bad boys or do they like who the rest of us perceive as bad based on a false premise?
Is writing the smartest blog in history make me the "bad boy of blogging on Facebook"?
How come men don't like bad girls or do they?
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