Disposable

I believe my first experience in empathy involved a sparrow. 

Like that kid in A Christmas Story, I got my Red Ryder BB Gun.  It was on my 8th Christmas.  Like any child with a new toy, I was in a rush to play with it.

By mid-afternoon that Christmas, my BB gun was no longer of interest to me.

I'm not a born hunter, I suppose. 
Maybe, just maybe, for a brief moment, I believed a sparrow is just a disposable animal.
Possibly, I wanted to prove to all the other 8 year olds that just because I don't have a dad, it did not mean I was lacking in testerone.
Maybe, I just had no idea how it would affect me to shoot and kill something as insignificant as a sparrow.

What I do know is that on that specific Christmas, I aimed my new BB gun right at a sparrow and shot it from the tree limb it was perched upon.  As it tumbled through the air and onto the ground by my feet, I laughed.

As the other boys kept laughing, I stopped.  Something about seeing a little bird twitch and chirp until its' tiny lungs could no longer function had a profound effect on me.

It's too much guilt for an 8 year old to have to bear knowing he needlessly shot and killed something as majestic as a bald eagle.

But it was just a sparrow.  As if that means it's less significant than our nation's symbolic bird of prey.

I don't think in terms of disposable.  Not anymore.

To me, that sparrow was a bald eagle.


It's that mentality of disposable that bothers me.

Master vs. Slave.  Slavery was based on one group of people being more disposable than another.

Six million Jews were the poster children of disposable.

It is that mentality that allows a society to label unborn children as a choice.

It's the mentality behind every bully that carefully chooses his target.  And we all laugh until that disposable victim takes his or her own life.

It's the battlecry of "Nuke em" everytime a small group of small minded people attack us; all because we don't equate all people as all being human. 

Sub-humans.  White trash.  Nigger.  Faggot.  Beaner.  Gook.  Right wing religious fanatic.  Left wing fascist pig.  Whore.  Retard.  Hippie.  Welfare mom.  Handicapped. Fat ass.

I'm watching some show called What's Eating You.  It follows some 80 pound girl around as she binges and purges.  She thinks she's fat.  She says she likes being skinny.  She's starving herself.  On purpose.  Because being fat makes her less significant.  Because being healthy does not equate to self-worth.

 She's a sparrow.  Unless, she starves herself.  She believes that.

Then, I find myself watching some show called Tiaras & Toddlers.  Beauty pageants for 3 year olds.  Spray tans, hair extensions, makeup, swim suits... with judges judging who the prettiest 3 year old is on stage.

Three year olds who are simply preparing themselves for their next TV appearance.  The one that will occur in 10 years called What's Eating You.

Sometimes, I find myself watching this show with fat people trying to lose weight.  It's called The Biggest Loser.  It's a play on words.  They're trying to lose weight.  I get it.  But lets not pretend that we don't notice that the word loser is intentionally leading us to believe that an obese person is a loser.

But I will admit that those Taco Bell commercials that come on during The Biggest Loser do cause me to spend some of my disposable income on fast food.

So much irony in disposable people helping me spend my disposable income on those things that made them disposable.  Think about it.


I don't know when exactly we all learn about empathy.  For me, it was around 8 years old.

Who teaches us that one group of people is more significant than another?  Who invented this idea that some people are disposable?

When is our empathy replaced with some self-absorbed narcissitic quality that determines we are better than someone else?  

Who among us believes they are a sparrow and who believes they are a bald eagle?

Then, tell me the differences.

I don't see any.